A Light in the Family

Up until 14 years ago on precisely April 16, 1996, the day we received the keys to Dexter Woods, we did like most newlyweds and young families and moved a lot.  But Dexter Woods was going to be different.  It wasn't long before Jeanette knew that this was to be our HOME.  It was time to put down roots or, as REO Speedwagon sang in their 1984 hit Can't Fight This Feeling,  "it's time to bring this ship into the shore and throw away the oars forever." Each time I got the hankerin' to look around a bit and find that "better house,"  you know, that one with the greener grass, I was gently reminded we were going to stay at Dexter Woods.  It wasn't a command or an insistence on the part of my wife but, rather, a feeling that we NEEDED to stay put . Stay put and be here for our children.  We felt that in a rapidly changing world, something needed to be the same.  True, the gospel would always be the same but we needed to be at Dexter Woods-- always at Dexter Woods for our children.  Their memories and ours are to remain, growing brighter and deeper with the passage of time.  This wouldn't be one of those places that you used to live at and now can only drive by without ever going in again.  No, the toys, the chatter, the dancing together in the dining room,  the Sunday dinners and tons of invited guests, the late night conversations, the movies, the family prayers, the Thanksgiving feasts and the waiting on the stairs before going to see what gifts Santa brought on Christmas morning, are to remain within the place that we can all return to as often as we want, go inside, and create even more memories.

One of my favorite scriptures is from the Doctrine and Covenants, Section 111 verses 7-8.  There the Prophet Joseph Smith is instructed by the Lord,

We've always felt that "peace" and "power" flowing through this place we call home.

I still haven't gotten to the title of this blog yet so bear with me a few more minutes. 

When one stays put, it is easier to more clearly observe the patterns of life. It's like something out of focus becomes clear.  For instance, I have noticed the cycle of the wild animals in our yard and neighborhood.  One year, we may have an abundance of rabbits and squirrels.  That same year, we'll have an abundance of that marvelously stealth bird of prey-- the owl.  When the owl and red-tail hawk and other predators have diminished the rodent population sufficiently, the next season we'll see or hear far fewer of all the above.  It's a fascinating cycle.

Likewise, the cycles of the seasons are wonderful.  I absolutely love the four seasons in Missouri! It seems as though there are precisely three months of each season.  At the beginning of each season, all are so anxious for it to begin.  Summer is welcomed with gusto and sunshine. The cleaning, the pool memberships, the trips planned, the yard work, the spider webs, the fireflies, the ice cream truck the children insist that a parent is with them before approaching, the super-intense moving-at-35-mph Missouri thunderstorms we love to watch from the front porch, the humidity and the "smell of Missouri."  That mix of grass, flowers, abundant hardwood trees, damp mulch, wet rock and humidity.  The barbecues stoked with wood from the yard and gazing up at the sky on a clear night while you're taking Vallie Girl out one more time, with only crickets still conversing, and seeing Mars in August.  And the garden in full production.

But, you know, that 2-3 weeks of 95 degrees and 70% humidity seeems to imbue one with a longing for cooler days and school to begin again.  And so it does. The next season and the next and the next-- each welcomed with a joyful hug and then waved good-bye to like a visitor whose finally driving away after having stayed too long. (We haven't had any stay too long but it seemed a good way to put it.  Really. You don't believe me do you?)

James Horner wrote a beautiful piece of music used in the 1999 film Bicentennial Man entitled, The Passage of Time, A Changing of Seasons.  The piece is played as the father watches a film of him dancing with his daughter just a few hours prior on her wedding night.  Becoming emotional at this scene being replayed for him, the turns away from another to hide his emotions.  From a very young age, I have been keenly attuned to the passage of time and often find it a vivid experience.  Now, my hair is gray and my children are growing up.  Indeed, my oldest daughter and her husband are center stage in this passage of time and changing seasons for tomorrow, within a few short hours, they will see the arrival of the first baby into their family.  I will become a grandparent with my wife and my children will suddenly become aunts (lots of them) and an uncle.  Time has passed and the season is changing for each of us.  And its going to be a long, wonderful season; one that extends our family and Dexter Woods beautifully. 

Some dear friends of ours from Mexico are of European (Spanish) descent.  The patriarch of their very large family said once, "It is important to always have a baby in the family.  For, a baby in the family, is a light in the family."  I'm so very pleased that, with my youngest now at five years old, we will once again have a baby in the family.  The light is bright.

Congratulations to Alia and Adam and their new son coming tomorrow.